So my first month of being “part-time” (which I put in quotes because it basically means just trying to reach some sort of normal American working hours schedule as opposed to crazy full-time biglaw schedule) is in the books – and I’ll say it was a fail in some ways, but a success in others.
I think it was a fail because:
1. I am tired AF. I took a 10-day vacation. Though wonderful, I was still tied to my computer 2-3 hours a day. Which actually was fine. I have less anxiety being on top of my e-mails, and it’s much better in my opinion to stay connected as opposed to coming back to a inbox full of 500+ e-mails [trust me, I tried that one time and legit thought my inbox was going to be the death of me]. But, trying to navigate making sure deadlines were not missed while I was out, and figuring out who would be attending hearings while I was mid-air in flights did not do much to relax my brain.
2. I billed 140 hours. Considering my annual billable target of 1600 hours/year, I should be billing closer to 130 hours/month. I billed 140 this month – all the while having taken a 10 day vacation. Not good. I.e., normally if you take a vacation – your hours should be less than your typical monthly average. Also, don’t forget – this is 140 BILLABLE. Even though my time tracker only notes 5 non-billable hours, that’s only because I don’t track all non-billable hours. So go ahead and add another 20-30 non-billable hours which includes all things such as client development meetings, office events, and even things like closing my billable time in the system and preparing client bills (all non-billable tasks).
3. My brain is FRIED. You’d think after traveling for vacation that you’d come back feeling refreshed. Uhm, no. Not at all, actually. Having to catch up for the time you were out actually diminishes returns. I am EXHAUSTED. I feel like I worked double this month.
However, in some ways, I’ll call this month a success:
1. I’ve been able to say “no” to new work. I get paid a substantial amount less than my colleagues who work full time, so I feel I can be more vocal about my boundaries now. I felt pretty dignified not working much on the weekends (though the guilt of not working was almost worse than actually working).
2. I made all my kids’ school events and felt like I spent enough time with them. I also worked from home more than usual this month with no shame which made life a hair easier. Also the fact I was even able to take a vacation and be mostly unbothered (except for a few e-mails I received that sent me into rage), was a success in and of itself.
3. I got into a new routine with a babysitter who gives me a break when I need it. This even included me finding the time to get new car seats for her car so she can help pick up the kids and take them to school.
In all, I’m recognizing going “part-time” will be a work in progress. It’s hard to shed some of the work I’m already assigned to now, but I’m hoping I can find some ways to achieve a normal schedule. In any case, 140 hours is better than 250. I know from witnessing others who have gone on reduced schedules that going “part-time” as a lawyer is no easy feat. It’ll be a journey, but one I still think is worth taking.