6am: Wakes up. Sleep walks to the computer. Logs-on and starts reading e-mails while her eyes adjust to the light radiating from the computer screen. Tries to organize inbox as much as possible to prepare for the influx of e-mails she will receive that day.
7am: Time to get things together. She packs kids’ lunches, boils eggs for breakfast. Packs computer and work bag which can sometimes include the 8 binders she brought home with her last night.
7:30am: Gets herself ready. Mom must be ready before she even walks near the kids’ bedroom.
8am: Mom is ready, lunches and bags packed. Though terrified of what may ensue, mom enters into the kids’ rooms. Thankfully the kids are dressed in clothes from the night before. The older one goes potty, the younger one gets a diaper change.
8:10am: Kids are ready, time to go downstairs. Older one cries that mom is holding the younger one. Jealousy ensues. Mom tries to control the tempers, and picks up both at the same time. By the time she makes it down the stairs, she has already burned a thousand calories.
8:20am: Mom throws kids in the car. At least if they are in their carseats, they can’t move. Mom throws granola bars into the car, along with: 2 lunch boxes, items for “show and tell” at school, shoes and socks, mom’s 8 work bags, and whatever other necessary items. If it’s a good day, mom remembers to bring breakfast and lunch for herself.
8:30am: Mom drops kids off at school. If it’s a good day, everyone gives mom a kiss goodbye. If it’s a bad day, everyone cries. Mom has important meetings that day and has no choice but to go to work. Mom spends all day at work hating herself and wishing she were a better mom.
9am: Mom makes it into work. Sits at her computer. Feels exhausted. Opens e-mails and tries to focus.
9:30-11:30am: Mom works speediously. No time to chat by the printer or in the kitchen. Mom has limited time to get work done and needs to stay focused.
Noon: Mom snacks on pringles. No time for lunch. Mom needs to bill because she has to pick up the kids at 6:30pm.
3pm: Mom gets an e-mail from a senior partner who asks about her “availability” because it looks like she is “low on hours.” Mom really wants to scream because she is already exhausted and can’t take on more, but that’s not reflected on her billable report. She says she’s happy to take on more work, but that’s she’s concerned about her current workload. Mom gets staffed on more assignments.
3:30pm-6pm: Mom works on a million assignments at a time while 1) answering phone calls and e-mails; 2) adding items to instacart; and 3) ordering new shoes and toys for the kids on Amazon. She slowly makes progress. But mom is tired.
6pm: Mom frantically leaves work. Rolls up to school 5 minutes before it closes.
6:45pm-8pm: Kids are crazy. Kitchen is a disaster. She unpacks lunch boxes and does the dishes while contemplating every life decision. Everyone is crying. Mom throws kids into the bath and finally calms everyone down. Mom manages to get the kids in bed by 8:30pm.
8:30pm-12am: Mom showers and de-compresses for 5 minutes before opening up her laptop once again. Now she can finally review the 50 e-mails that came through during the day that were bogged down by more pressing assignments. Mom looks at her calendar for the next day and begins to prepare again. She questions what she is doing with her life and begins to cry. She can’t think of a better job. She makes good money to support her family and finally made it “to the top.” She goes to sleep, says her prayers, and tells herself tomorrow will be a better day.
This is just one example of a day, but it’s no wonder that once mom does this for an extended period of time, she’s beyond exhausted.
No matter how much “help” you have or hire, your kids still want and need you. You’ll have days when you question whether it’s even humanly possible to be a lawyer mom.
I definitely do.